1/3 – Put-In-Bay, Lakewood

The evening was one of distorted unrest, but some of us rested during the distortion.

And I don’t know about you, but if bartending were my profession and someone ordered water, I would find the biggest glass that I could to put that water in. Since the water is free, there’s a darn good chance that the person ordering the water will not leave a tip, so the big glass would mean less trips back to the bar, which would mean less work for the bartender to do for free. So then why would a bartender find the tiniest cup (next to a shot glass) to serve water in? Perhaps he just loves his job so much that he doesn’t do it for the money. Or not. Guess what size glass I got when I ordered water.

Here’s a cold weather tip: frigid temperatures will not affect you if you are either from Minnesota, drunk, or both.

If you’re in need of a mathematical tip, then you’ve come to the right place. Ready? Let’s begin. No wait, that’s learning a foreign language. Okay, whatever.
When spoken, the words “one” and “eleven” sound quite different and are generally not interchangeable. When written, 11 becomes 1 if the person writing those numbers gets tired (or forgets to keep writing). When ending a gig, just split the difference and stop at midnight.

Now get out there in the cold and do some math.