12/5 – Enclave Coffee House

This is not just your average every day coffee house…according to their sign, it’s also a video rental. However, I can’t remember seeing any video section and/or anyone returning or leaving with a video.

Ooooh, I know ~ it must be the video that some girl was making on her little camcorder thing. She was recording us for a bit, then went over to some guy who was sketching (my take on that to follow) and was shooting him while he was doing his sketch thing. But, not shooting with a gun. There were signs posted that firearms were not allowed… Anyway, that’s gotta be it. Okay, that mystery is solved. I can sleep tonight.

I did a little survey (asked Jake) and it’s unanimous that being sketched is much worse than being photographed. With a picture it’s like yankin’ off a band aid; quick and almost painless. But, with being sketched it’s kind of like a slow, painful death. And I felt bad if I moved. I certainly didn’t want him to have to start over.

Oddly enough, they had a stage. I’m talkin’ a real stage with outlets and room to move about the cabin. It was a small cabin, but my point is that some of the official-like bars we’ve played in just moved a table over and smashed us into a corner that was as far away from an outlet as you could get without going to the next county.

Being up there was like being stuck in the back seat of the car on a family trip and not being able to reach the heater which was on full blast. We could see the source of the heat, but couldn’t reach it and even if we could have reached it, just like in the car on a family trip we would have caught all kinds of grief had we tried to adjust anything in the driver’s domain. I still have an aversion to adjusting the controls in someone else’s car, but enough about that. Let’s get back to the gig, shall we?

I took another survey (asked Jake again) and determined that despite our roasting, this was actually one of the most fun gigs we’ve had. And We sold another CD! Thank you, John. Plus, we got some tips (money tips, not stock market tips).

It started out with being a mixture of people, most pretty young-ish, but with a smattering of “older” people and everyone seemed like pretty normal blue collar types.

But then….

There was the guy wearing fish net gloves with the fingers cut out who mysteriously produced a bridge (as in teeth) while talking with us and nonchalantly put it back in his mouth without missing a beat in the conversation.

Some bikers came in (not that there’s anything wrong with that) and one of the women had long hair down to her hips, but remember in the 80’s or 90’s when people went from long hair to short hair and kept one strand of the long hair and braided cords or ribbon into it? Well, this woman apparently did that and then let her hair grow out again, but kept the braided piece too. That braided piece of hair was down to her ankle. I am not kidding. I kept wondering how she managed to not catch it in anything or trip over it or choke on it in her sleep. Then I pictured her riding on the bike with the wind blowing that part of her hair straight back and how distracting that would be for the person in the car behind them, but then I decided it might be a good idea to pay attention to what ever song we were doing at the time.

While Mudcat was singing his version of I’ll Be Watching You (I’ll be stalking you), one guy caught it and started laughing. Then his buddies came in, so he ran up to tell them about it like he was a 7th grade girl telling her friends that the cutest boy in the whole school just talked to her. So, they all turned around to watch and listen and when Mudcat got to the second time around he switched it back to “watching you”. This guy’s friends all turned around to tell the guy what an idiot he was and then they all walked away and left him there. It was pretty amusing.

But then….

There was this chick that clearly wanted to be a boy (and was quite close to pulling it off too) who was hanging out with some friends in the back of the room. One of those boys clearly wanted to be something, but I’m not sure what that something was. It was kind of like looking at the half man/half woman at the circus. At first I thought his head was completely shaved and that some girl with shoulder length jet black hair was sitting really close to him and I wondered how that wouldn’t become annoying after a couple of hours. Turns out it was all him. The black hair was sprouting out of one part of the shaved head and it kind of looked like the hair on those dolls where you pull on it to make it grow.

The girl who was working there joined them and took off her shirt (don’t get excited, she had a camisole underneath) and then chick-boy gave her a massage.

Oh yeah, Jake’s Nirvana song was a big, big hit with chick-boy and friends. Mudcat and I liked it too!

But then….

One of the boys carried what looked like a dog dish over to the microwave and moments later he took the dog dish out of the microwave and carried it with him while he went outside with his friends. As he passed by, it looked like chicken soup in the bowl. So, apparently the friends went out to smoke and he decided that dining outdoors during a blizzard would be a really fun thing to do. Or maybe he just likes to eat in the smoking section.

11/8 – Hammers Barn & Grille

No, I didn’t mean Bar & Grille…it looks like a big old barn up on top of a big old hill.

There were a couple of boys playing the bowling machine when we were setting up right next to it and it sort of felt like we were part of a giant pin ball machine, because of the bells and ching-ching sounds coming from the bowling machine. At least the boys were nice enough to step away from the machine and belly up to the bar during the gig.

Jake made his solo singing debut!!!! Great job, by the way. And you know what this means, don’t you? Oh, let me tell you ~ MORE Jake songs. Hey, don’t yell at me, you started it.

Betty and Bernie were there as our support group. Okay, let me rephrase that ‘cause that just sounds like we’re in rehab. Betty and Bernie were there to cheer us on! And Betty is our new unofficial videographer. Well, I guess it’s official now.

Oh, and the latest episode of “what Lola hears” went like this during our break ~
Betty: would you guys like a drink?
Mudcat: I think I’ll have a Killian’s, myself
What Lola heard: I think I’ll have to kill myself
I really didn’t think the 1st set was that bad…

One of the boys at the bar was trying to be a wisenheimer and yelled out “dueling banjos” in response to Mudcat asking if there were any requests. Poor dumb thing had no idea that Jake and Mudcat knew the song. They just switched their handy dandy super high tech guitars to banjo mode and started dueling. I swear I heard someone squealing like a pig off in the distance. I didn’t.

Oh, and on the way home we saw a coyote. He ran across the street right in front of our very own eyes. Pretty sure it wasn’t just your standard run of the mill coyote…I’m thinkin’ it was Wyle E. Coyote ~ Super Genius.

11/1 – 3rd Base

CONGRATULATIONS, TRUDY AND RICK ON YOUR NEW PLACE!

It was kinda like a family reunion of sorts ~ Joani and her crew, Connie and the Woody’s gang, Little Pat, Shannon, and Rick. I apologize if I’ve left any one out.

The new Bose system worked great! Can’t wait to see Jake’s reaction at the next gig.

Our first guest “singer” of the night was Maureen. She did, however provide us with a public service announcement to turn our clocks back. She reminded us quite a lot, as a matter of fact.

Rick came up and sang (for real) “Amy” with us, but we changed it to “Trudy”. He’s a nice boy.

And I really like our new version of “rock me”…very sexy.

10/18 – Scoreboards

We started out with some technical difficulties, but quickly recovered. And we had way more room than the last time we were there…a booth and the gumball / treats machines were moved out of the corner. It was almost spacious, but not really.

Joani and Dan were there, but left early on because they sprouted horns. I learned that through a quick game of charades, which greatly amused the guys at the table in front of us.

Mudcat did some “new” songs and revisited some others that were oh so too much fun. I especially liked Rock Me.

Jerry (the guy, not the cow) came up and sang with us during Amy.

Oh, and you know how I love to hear snippets of conversations during the gigs…here’s a keeper ~ “he’s the reason why our dog only has one ball”. Pretty sure she was not talking about the bouncing, foot or base kind.

10/17 – Brewsters

This used to be an Arabica. It had pretty much the same set up as an Arabica, with the addition of a bar at one end. A coffee house with adult beverages ~ it’s the best of both worlds.

Our new friend, Bill was making a dull job fun by singing and dancing to and from his cleaning locations using the broom as a microphone and/or dance partner. He said that he liked us because we didn’t bring in a bunch of “really old, nursing home people” who got too drunk and made a mess that he had to clean up. He also said that I sound like Alanis Morissette. Never thought that or been told that before, but I took it as a compliment.

Our other new friend, Jerome did the usual request then leave thing, but he came back.

We discovered where Jake hails from ~ I-Dee-I-Dee’O, which is just south of South Belfast.

Bernie and Betty were there and during one song Bernie had happy fingers rather than happy feet, doing the best chorus line kicks ever. Hey…if the Rockets ever branch out to finger puppets, he’ll never have to look for work again!

9/27 – The Brew Kettle

We ended up doing just one long set as the gig, since we had to wait for the people in the front booths to clear out so that Albert could convert that space into our stage.

Albert was not our uncle, he was our sound guy. Well, he’s not our sound guy – he came with the place. He was a nice boy.

Jake’s crew was there; Betty, Bernie, Grandma, the neighbors, some friends from school and some of my clan were there as well; Joani, Peg, Jeremy, Mary. And Billy Sullivan his own self was there (pretty sure that was just a coinkie dink). Does this mean we have a following? Just so they don’t start handing out pamphlets at the airport…uh, oh – keep an eye on Bernie.

And Peanuts stopped by, but he must have just missed us. He’s a nice boy, too. I’m sure we’ll see him again. I’m not scared.

The good thing is that the place was pretty full when we got there and the even better thing is that it didn’t empty out once we started playing. Guess it’s true…we’re really not as annoying as you might think.

Jake did a super duper fun version of “stray cat strut” with Mudcat adding in some scat at the end. I liked it most much!

9/20 – C-Town

Okay, maybe somebody out there can answer this question for me…why is it called C-Town if it’s in Broadview Hts? Shouldn't it be called B-Town? And it’s not just the bar. There’s C-Town Pizza and the C-Town quicki-mart (would you like a spoon straw for your Slurpee?).

Oh, but that’s not the only question I had. Read on, if you dare.

Why is it called a clam bake when the clams are not baked? And the answer is: Originally and/or traditionally, the items of a clam bake were stacked in layers of soaked seaweed and baked over glowing hot rocks in the sand. I’m thinkin’ that technically that’s not a clam bake either, since the wet seaweed would steam the stuff. Hey, what do I know?

But wait, there's more – unbeknown to me, we were picking up radio signals through Mudcat’s guitar. The chatter could be heard quite clearly through the ear buds, but not as easily just from the amp. When the first bits of chatter came through, I asked Jake (who was not wearing ear buds) if he could hear that. He did the concentrate on listening thing and then said no, so naturally I started to wonder if I’d finally taken that step through the looking glass and/or if I’d be able to find my way back. Sure would have made singing White Rabbit more interesting...not really, but it did make me wonder, because the voices in my head were doing the "turn or burn" speech. So, I asked Mud if he could hear the voices in my head. I wanted him to ask me if the voices in my head were telling me to repent like the voices in his head were telling him. When he answered that he could hear religious stuff too, it made me feel much better. Hearing the chit chat in between songs was amusingly annoying or annoyingly amusing, it sort of switched back and forth.

Oh yeah, they had a Big Buck hunting game there, but this one must have been the deluxe model, because it was also a safari game (see first post for Den Too for previous sighting of a Big Buck game). There was a patchwork of animal print on the base of this game and one of the prints was zebra. Oh guess what I was wearing...that’s right...zebra print. And let’s not forget about my rug (not that rug, ya big perv) that’s leopard and tiger. I was oh so too very afraid that the boys who were "hunting" would notice and turn the guns on me. They didn’t.

There was a crew at the end of the bar who were very happy with the songs we did. I was shocked and amazed to see them swaying with their arms up and singing along to I’m Leavin’ On A Jet Plane. One guy even did the lighter thing.

They danced for some of the songs and one guy did this weird dance thing with his sandal. I guess it was his version of dancing with a broom. Maybe he thought he was Fred Astaire. He wasn’t.

Pete and Linda ventured out to show their support. Thanks!

But, my favorite part of the evening was when people at the bar literally stopped in the middle of their conversation to turn around and watch Jake play. Yeah, he’s that good. And it happened a few times during the course of the gig. I don’t know if he noticed, but Mudcat and I both did. Way to go, Jamaica Jake!

9/6 – Scoreboard’s

It was pretty quiet for a Saturday night, but there were a couple of guys there who were feeling no pain and they decided that it would be a really good idea to come up and sing “Amy” with us.

One of the guys bought us a barley soda (well, we each got one. It’s not like he just bought us one and we had to share).

Mudcat has a new fan (and deservedly so). She’s a cute little girl who was there with her parents. When I walked by their table while doing a sound check, she looked up at her mom and said with great enthusiasm, “he’s a really good singer”.

The gig was going great until…I think I may have coughed up a hairball. Of course it was right in the middle of a song. Not just a song, but in the middle of “Bobby McGee”. Oh well, I weathered through it and life goes on.

Other than that, it was a pretty low key gig. Fun, but low key.

9/5 – Rider’s 1812 Inn

This is a bed & breakfast place. Very quaint. I almost expected to see Dick, Joanna, George, and Stephanie…

It was a rainy night, but not in Georgia. Although, it could have been. I just don’t know.

We had a wee bit of technical difficulty early on, but Mudcat fixed us right up and we went on to do the gig technologically sound.

Well, now we can add paper airplane to the list of items that have been thrown in our general direction during a gig. Once again, glad it wasn’t tomatoes…or boots, like last time.

Carol is our new best friend. She bought a CD! That’s only part of the reason she’s our new best friend. She also bought my soup (which was dee-lish) in lieu of buying me a drink, since I was drinking water. Yeah, I was pretty shocked at my choice of a beverage item too. I must have panicked. Okay, the real reason that Carol is our new best friend is because she really liked us and she was very supportive all night. Did I mention that she bought a CD?

8/30 – Tony’s Tribe cook out

This was a private party, back yard cook out, pot luck type event. Tons of food. Someone even brought home made macaroni and cheese. You know how I love m&c, but I don’t love it enough to eat it cold, which it was when we took our break. Shoulda nagged Mud all through the first set about stopping to eat so it could be like old times…nah.

There was college football on the big screen and an interesting version of a golf tournament going on, not to mention the great play area for the kids (although, most of the kids decided that it would be way more fun to play with the extra microphone than it would be to play in the inflatable castle. Especially Mike. He was Jake’s favorite kid there).

Joe, one of the kids there, sat in on a couple of songs with us, playing Jake’s guitar. He was pretty good.

But, Sidney was our little rock star. She started out all shy with the microphone while sitting in the chairs that were lined up so the kids could feel like they were at a concert, then she scootched up to sitting on the ground in front of us facing the rows of chairs. That progressed to standing next to me, which quickly turned into sharing my rug (which worked out, since I finally found someone shorter than me). She kept looking up at us while she sang back up. Wasn’t quite sure if the look was for her cue to come in or wondering why we weren’t singing when she thought we should be. Then she progressed to her very own mic stand. Apparently, she liked singing more than she liked playing the maracas, because she gave those back to me pretty early on. She was very polite and said thank you to us before she left.

There was a pooch that could have used a doggie downer, but fortunately we all stayed upright and the equipment stayed in tact.

It seemed like everyone had a great time. We ended up doing 2 encores (and I’m not talkin’ TV dinners).

Thanks, Tony! Hope to see you next year.

8/23 – The Brew Keeper

Many mojo thanks to Betty and Bernie for your support and for bringing your friends, neighbors, countryman. But most of all, thanks for mojo-izing Chase (who I will be calling Jake until further notice).

One thing they have at the Brew Keeper that I never noticed before is a baby monitor type devise that let’s them hear when the front door is open. It plays an annoying electronic version of “be it ever so humble, there’s no place like home”. It was on the ledge right next to us, which was fine until it started playing. I thought that Mudcat had some new thing set up with the equipment. He didn’t. And I quickly found a new home for the monitor. No, I didn’t throw it away…geesh.

Our new friend, Joe requested a couple of songs; “Bobby McGee” and “Amy”. Then he went outside. So, we waited for him to get thirsty again and to resurface, which he did. Then I sang “Bobby McGee”. He went into the brew room at the beginning of the song and came back out right as we were finishing. We followed with “Amy” and he decided that he should take his beer and leave in the middle of that song. Perhaps he was afraid his beer was aging too quickly…

Mudcat and Jake did their very own private Idaho (I mean private Oshkosh) version of “I shot the sheriff”. Most entertaining indeed.

Bernie requested Betty’s favorite song, so Jake sang that. It’s a wholesome family song.

Aside from that, a good time was had by all.

8/16 – Larchmania

WHAT FUN!!!

This was a private block party - their 2nd annual. This year it was actually more like a street party than a block party. Unless you went to one block and partied, and then went to the next block. It could be a progressive block party. Is that what it would be if Progressive insurance merged with H&R Block and had a celebration? Maybe not.

All the neighbors were being neighborly and the little kids were riding their bikes and/or having water balloon fights, couples were walking hand in hand down the sidewalk. It was all oh so too very picturesque, so I called it our Mayberry gig.

But that name changed when the 2 girls who were feeling no pain from their barley sodas started dancing in the street. They were nice drunks and they were having fun. Isn’t that what it’s all about? Oh no, wait that’s the hokey pokey.

Chase made his gig debut! Welcome. He did a great job and I believe he had fun as well. What a concept…

He and I were dessert judges during our break. We both took that job quite seriously. As Chase put it, “butter and cake…my 2 favorite foods”. He’s wise beyond his years. And yes, we were called Paula and Simon.

I got my very first autograph request, even though it was from a pre-schooler. He asked me for my “autograft” and lifted up his shirt for me to sign his back. I was pretty sure that his mom would not appreciate my writing on her son, so after some discussion, he and I decided that his bike helmet would be a much better place for me to sign. So, I did.

We were invited back for next year, so I that’s a way good thing. We’re looking forward to it!

8/1 – Solon Freeway Lounge

William and his crew were there at the beginning and for a while we thought they might be it for the duration, but eventually more people started to filter in and we ended up with a nice group.

It was just border line too hot, but there was a big old fan right above the bar that William was nice enough to turn toward us.

I got another gig wound to add to my list. This time it’s my big toe, but don’t worry me…I’ll be alright. Let me just say that a 75-ish lb Behringer will win over a big toe every time.

Other than that, I got nothin’.

7/26 – The Crow’s Nest

Merry Christmas!

No, we didn’t sing any Christmas carols, although we did get a request for some.

What a grand time we had! Everyone at the bar was so much fun, especially Mario and Michelle. They were there for the duration.

Mario came up and sang with us and Michelle alternated between being mortified and swooning like he was a big rock star. Very interesting to watch.

Another boy came up to sing too, but I don’t know his name.

What I do know is that a good time was had by all!

And we had our own private Idaho nature channel goin’ on during the drive ~ got to see another heron on the way out there. Then on the way back, Bambi was at the side of the road looking ready to spring into Frogger action at any moment. Thankfully, that didn’t happen. At least not to us…

7/19 – Brew Keeper

They have an actual “stage” now. Much better than rearranging the tables and jamming into a corner.

Much to my surprise, Dede was there with some friends. What a nice treat it was to see her and to meet her friends. They stayed for most of the gig, but ended up going outside on the patio so the boys could smoke cigars.

Beverly and Julie were there for a wee bit, too.

And our Bobby McGee guy was there long after he said he had to leave, but that’s okay - he’s a great supporter. Wonder if he’s athletic…get it?

Other than that, it was a pretty quiet night...really quiet for some.

7/5 - Brutus' Sports Bar

This was the place that I did my very first gig 2 whole years ago. Re-mark-able...

It was also the gig that I discovered what a manipulative little bitch looks like when he grows up. And it's not pretty.

According to that manipulative little bitch, we played under a cloak of darkness and we were not allowed to have any fun. Oh yeah, and bass was "verboten".

I'm tellin' ya, singing the words "I'll probably feel a whole lot better when you're gone" took on an entirely new meaning.

The great thing about this gig was that it was part of Independence Day weekend and that was to be taken literally. Yeah, Mudcat!

7/5 - Tyler's 16th birthday party

CONGRATULATIONS, MUDCAT ON YOUR 400th GIG!!!!

This party was WAY out in the country. It was as far east of BFE as you can get.

Today's sign was "no spaghetti". Kinda like "no soup for you", but different.

They had a dog who looked like Petie from the Little Rascals. Oddly enough, the dog's name was Petie. Go figure. There were about 850 other dogs there too. They all were very nice to the humans and they played nicely together as well. Although, one of the dogs was "playing" a little too nicely and I'm pretty sure he was gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).

We set up shop next to the port-o-potties (yeah) and the company's name on the sign on the door was BJ's... makes ya wonder, doesn't it? Well, it made me wonder.

When we sang our version of "happy birthday" to Tyler, he was one step ahead of us doing his cartwheels. It was when he did the forward somersault that the trouble started...and then he was thrown into the pool by his friends, but as hot I it was I don't think that was a bad thing. The dogs were even jumping in there to do a few laps to cool off every couple minutes.

If we could combine the main and side dish items from this party with the desserts from the 4th party, that would be a way good buffet. These people knew how to make mac salad. I'm all about the food.

7/4 ~ Meadows Neighborhood Fireworks

On the way to this gig we saw a most interesting and questionably worded sign ~ Eggs and Kittens. We also saw a crane (the water type not the lifting type) and the ever listing Nessie.

This was a private idaho party for the 4th and everyone was so very nice. Tons of kids, very family oriented. Well, family oriented with adult beverages.

Our biggest support group was the kids. They set up camp about 3 feet away from us. Madison had her pink Hannah Montana guitar, complete with a mat and a microphone ("hey, good lookin' ~ we'll be back to pick you up later").

The food was a catered pig roast and tons of side dish items (although Joani's mac salad wins hands down) and gobs of great dessert items.

One little boy quickly became my favorite munchkin, because his plate had 1 of each kind of dessert item. That was it. And he was all by his own self right in front of us jammin' away while he put on his sugar buzz. His dad brought over a hot dog for him and he took an obligatory bite of it only because his dad held it for him and practically forced it on him. I so wanted to tell his dad that if he put frosting on it the kid might eat it. Maybe that's why I don't have kids...

When we were packing up, Madison's friend came up to me and asked me if I was excited about the fireworks. I told her that yes, yes I was (because I really was). Although, I'm pretty sure it was for different reasons. Her thing was that she got to stay up WAY past her bedtime, which is 8:00. My bedtime is 8:00 only if I'm butt ass tired from too much play time.

6/27 – Solon Freeway Lounge

Oh guess what, it rained. Gosh, what a shock. Kinda like our own version of the Farmers’ Almanac. But, everyone adapted again by cozying in under the awning.

We had another “priceless” moment. This guy was sitting at a table with a group of friends, having a nice conversation and a split second later he was flat on his back on the floor, but still sitting in his chair. Turns out that one of the legs snapped off. It was a heavy duty plastic chair, but apparently not heavy duty enough. He was given a heavy duty metal one as a replacement. The best thing about all that was that he didn’t spill his beer. It ended up being a bottle full of Corona foam, but no spillage. Now that’s a professional.

Our new friend is William. He was most happy with the songs we did, but I felt like Bobby and McGee were having a tug of war with me in the middle. Not so pleasant, but I persevered. Don’t worry about me…I’ll be alright…

6/21 – The Swiss Chalet

It’s like déjà vu all over again…

We were able to leave everything set up from the night before, so that was a wonderful treat. However, it rained quite a bit during the night and their roof leaked. Guess where it leaked. That would be correct. Fortunately, there was no damage to any of the equipment other than it being a bit soggy.

And speaking of the whole déjà vu thing, there was another bachelorette party and what do you think was the name of the bride-to-be? Think back…not that far back…Angie. Now what are the odds of that? Okay, all you mad scientists can stop trying to calculate the odds, it was a rhetorical question. And rhetorical is going to be my big word for the day. Not that it’s that big, but it just sounds good.

We had lots of dancers again, who remarkably found ways to fast dance to slow Beatles songs…over and over and over…

For our viewing pleasure this time, we got to see some guy ooze off his bar stool and crumble onto the floor, wedging himself between the bar and the stools. Not that we took pleasure in seeing someone in that state, but it was pretty amusing. It happened during one of Anno's songs and in the middle of it she did the "priceless" thing. I can't believe she didn't bust up laughing. And it took a while for his friends to notice that he was one with the floor. What’s even more bazaar to me is that he was out on the dance floor not 5 minutes before that and appeared to be just fine.

Pete, Linda, Paul, and Little B. came out to show their support (of us, not the guy on the floor).

We played Clue again, but it wasn't as much fun this time.

And we acquired a new best friend. Thankfully, this guy showed up near the end. He was quite a Chatty Cathy. He was also quite drunk and we got to see him hurling on the sidewalk after the gig. Let's say it was the alcohol and not us.

6/20 – The Swiss Chalet

For this gig I thought that we should change our name to the Robinsons and sing “we are family”…Swiss Family Robinson…get it? Okay, maybe not.

Oh guess what, I saw an eagle on the way out there! Honest, a real live one. I did.

Geneva-On-The-Lake is like a really scaled down version of Put-In-Bay, so we had a lot of people doing the wander in and wander back out thing. Most people danced a couple songs before heading back out.

A bachelorette party with Angie as the bride-to-be stayed with us for a while. C-Man sang “Angie” to her. Pretty clever, huh? Her maid of honor dragged her up on the stage for that song. Then we sang our version of “happy birthday” to her, but changed the words to “happy marriage”.

Some guy who clearly couldn’t decide if he was a break dancer or a gymnast (by the way, he was neither) made us all pretty nervous. We were a wee bit concerned that he was going to be a brake dancer as in brake his neck. Thankfully, he left the dance floor before anything horrible happened. I’m quite sure he woke up the next morning (afternoon) with aches and pains that he had no memory of self inflicting.

We had our own version of Clue goin' on. Remember that game? Well, we actually had a few versions of it, with one of those versions being more Clue-less than Clue.

Oh, I almost forgot about the moon. It was still pretty full, so there was some howling goin’ on.

6/14 – Mel’s Crows Nest

What a lively group we had!

William was the ring leader for the first shift. He really wanted to hear some country songs. ONLY country songs. C-Man sang a Buck Owens tune and Mudcat did a couple of Johnny Cash numbers. The closest thing to a country song that I sing is “Bobby McGee” and as I was singing it, the bar pretty much cleared out. I’m choosing to believe that it was because the group was waiting for a table in the restaurant side and it became available at that precise moment and not my singing that caused the mass exodus. Yeah, that’s it…

“Giddy up Dave” was clearly the HWIC (head weenie in charge) of the second shift crew. And what a crew they were! We had dancers and singers (kinda like country and western, but different).

Got to see some chick riding in the back of a pick up truck on the way home. She did not look happy. She did not look like any of the other dwarfs either…

6/13 – Solon Freeway Lounge

Friday the 13th…..

There must be some connection between our playing there and the weather being funky. Remember the flying umbrellas? Same place.

This time we were able to make it through almost the entire gig before the rain hit, but we were able to finish up on the patio with out having to tear down and rebuild. There were just enough chairs for the people who were still out there toward the end to move in under the canopy with us. I’m believing that it was the threat of the storm and not us that scared people off, because the patio was close to being full for most of the gig.

One of the girls was trying to request “take this job and shove it”, but all I could get from her was the “shove it” part and I thought it was a command rather than a song request. We don’t know that song.

Big G was our guest performer. He played the maracas. He and his buddy were a lot of fun and they’re great supporters when we play there.

Got to see Tiger Woods play sidewalk golf during one of our breaks. Interesting…

6/12- Bar One

We played on a stage, but the only way to get to it was by a spiral staircase. I have enough trouble with those things just by my own self, let alone lugging band equipment. And we were about a c-hair away from the ceiling, so it was most unpleasantly warm. I drank almost an entire picture of water and then of course had to pee (I know, I know…TMI). Guess where the bathrooms were…yeah, downstairs. Down 19 very steep stairs and then back up 19 very steep stairs. Yes, I counted them. And then there was actually a step up to get to the bathroom once you got in the door. GEESH

Definitely counting this gig as exercise.

The patio was full for a while, but there were only a few people inside. It was pretty low key, except for Sarah, the bar goddess. Pretty darn sure that she was a cheer leader in high school.
During one of the sets, I kept noticing the same guy pacing back and forth on the sidewalk in front of the patio. Every now and then he’d stop, but he kept looking in at us. I couldn't figure out why he didn’t just come in. Then on one of his passes by (the last one), he was carrying a pizza box (I’m assuming there was a pizza inside). So, I guess that’s one way to kill time while you’re waiting for a pie.

Hey, that could be our new slogan…Project Mojo: a good way to kill time while you’re waiting for a pie. Think the boys will go for it?

6/7 – Mel’s Crews Nest

A private party in a private club. Now that’s private.

But, I need to start from the beginning (it’s a very good place to start, you know). Since this was on Put-In-Bay, the experience goes way beyond the gig.

Let’s see…during the drive out there we discovered that Nessie is still there and she’s still listing.

We saw some swans. Not the Swan who sings with us, but the water fowl.

Let me ask you this ~ if you saw a sign advertising waterfront property, wouldn’t you assume that the water would be a lake or an ocean? Yeah, me too. Well, it was technically waterfront property, but the water was more like a fountain pool, but with out the fountain.

While we were waiting in line to board the ferry, we saw a guy and 2 girls walking together. The guy was in the middle with a girl on either side of him and he was holding hands with both girls. The girls didn’t seem to mind. Neither did he, for that matter.

Ms. Motion Sickness (that would be me) did okay on the ferry ride over. I was shocked and amazed.

We set up early so that we could have some time to cruise the island. The Perry monument was open and according to Ranger Rick, it’s taller than the Statue of Liberty’s torch. That’s pretty tall. The view from the top was amazing. Ice cream (double chocolate chunk) in the park after the tour was way fun for people watching.

Jane, our hostess for the evening was a big fan of rock and roll. John and Marie were there and John proved to be a very nimble dancer. We actually had quite a few dancers. It seemed that a good time was had by all. I had a grand time, except for when a mosquito decided to graze on my neck during a song when I couldn’t do anything but let him feast.

The ferry ride back was an event all by its own self. Waiting in line for 2-1/2 hours was interesting. And no, I’m not exaggerating (this time). You can ask Mudcat and/or C-Man. They’ll tell you the same thing. I started a game of "I spy"to pass the time, but it was short lived. Of course, I had to be an ass and spy something green when we had a line of trees to the side of us and it was a specific leaf that I spied. Once we snaked around to the front-ish of the line, I spotted a tree with a wad-o-shade, so off I went to sit under it to wait out the time.
There were signs posted telling bikers that they were welcome and that’s a good thing, because 28 motorcycles exited the ferry that we ended up boarding. Yes, I counted them. What else did I have to do?

We finally boarded the ferry and got out of the van to stand on the deck during the ride back. The ferry started moving and so did the waves. The swells came over the front of the boat and as the first one hit, I was turned around saying something to Mudcat and never saw it coming. The back of me got completely soaked. That water was a titty bit nipply even though the air temp was hellish. I realized that probably wouldn’t be the only swell, so I made my way around the front of the van and just as I got to the other side, another swell hit, this time soaking the front of me. Apparently, I was the entertainment for the people standing on the upper deck. All I could hear was their collective "oooooooh" as I got drenched. Once again, I did okay with not getting sea sick (or lake sick in this case).

The heat got to C-Man, though so he ended up trying to not be sick all the way home. He made it all the way back with out hurling, which was a very good thing.

It’s been determined that we islanded successfully.

6/6 - Key West

No, not Florida. Key West in Westlake.

We had a little rock star there. The cutest little boy was waiting for a table in the restaurant side with his parents and he was wearing junior ray bans. SO cute.

Mudcat has almost perfected his impression of Eric Clapton’s “thank you”. It’s close.

C-Man was E-less, but persevered.

Swan joined us for the last (or so we thought) set. We had everything but 1 cord packed up and then were told that it was a 4 hour gig, not a 3 hour gig (kinda like a 3 hour tour, but different). So, we set it all back up to start again so we could finish again. It was truly déjà vu all over again. Thanks, Yogi.

During one of the breaks, I saw the bartender make a really pretty drink, so I asked him what it was and what goes in it. Can’t remember the name, but I can remember all the ingredients. Which is truly sad, considering half the time I can’t remember where I park my car (aside from my driveway - I can usually find it there, even if I have no recollection of how it got there) or what I went into the next room to get. So, if you want the ingredients list so that you can make your own pretty foo-foo drink let me know.

5/30 - Panini's

This definitely felt like the shortest gig ever. Time flies when you're having fun (or when you're throwing a clock across the room).

We even made a new friend. His name is Craig and he seemed like a very nice boy. He started at the bar, which was about 8 miles from where we were and he moved into one of the booths near us. Craig was mesmerized by Mudcat's guitar playing and with good reason. He came up to us when we were packing it up and talked to us (well mostly to Mud) for a while.

Some of the people who stayed at the bar and the booths on that side of the room were craning their necks to see us and they clapped after every song.

One of the boys who was in the next room playing corn hole kept coming out to where we were when it wasn't his turn to throw. He told us how much he enjoyed listening to us.

Even the young pups were into us. Some of the girls were chair dancing and the boys were tapping there feet.

I think for the most part we were well received. However, there's always one in every crowd...

5/24 - Solon Freeway Lounge

Well, we were back on the patio. This time, the weather cooperated and there were no flying umbrellas.

It was "bowling for the cure" or "bowling for a cause" or something like that. A fund raiser for the cancer society. They had a buffet set up inside with some tasty treats and a big ol' grill set up on the patio for hamburgers and/or hot dogs. There were tons of baskets for the silent auction. Face painting for the kids. The only bad part about this event was that it was scheduled on the holiday weekend, so they really didn't have a great turn out for it.

We did find some back up singers, though. There was a group of teenage girls who were hanging out listening to us in between bowling, so C-Man called them up to the mic to sing with us. They were thrilled. Their parents were snapping pictures right and left. It was very cute.

5/24 - The Brew Keeper

They liked us! They really liked us.

Wow, guess I shouldn't have made that sound like it was a shocking revelation, huh? Anyway, people had fun. We got a lot of compliments.

The brewing room is pretty much all windows, so it's kinda neat to be able to watch what's going on in there while we're singing. However, at one point in the evening the brew room was filled with boys and all the windows fogged up...hmmm...what was really brewing in there?

5/23 - Epiq Bistro

No wardrobe malfunctions this time. Whew...
However, I did start out with a lightweight top on and then changed so that if we ended up setting up on the patio, I'd be warm enough. Bad career move. Not only did we not set up on the patio, but it was about 112 degrees inside. Thankfully, the smokers (people, not cooking equipment) have no regard for the cold and/or door closing. Since we were right by the door, we benefited from their open door policy with the cool air spilling in toward us.

Vinnie strapped on his guitar and sat in on the second set with us. He was truly the missing part of Project Mojo.

Some guy at the end of the bar spilled his drink and as he was brushing the spillage out of his way, he took the ice and threw it over his shoulder. Oh guess who was on the receiving end of that ice. That would be correct. The look on his face was pretty funny when he realized where that ice was headed. I laughed (more because of the look on his face than the ice flying at me)and then he laughed, so everything was fine. It could have been worse - at least he wasn't throwing tomatoes.

Kevin was celebrating his 21st birthday, so we sang a very special birthday song for him. Not sure if he enjoyed it, but we sure did.

5/17 – Solon Freeway Lounge

Well, it all started with my very own personal wardrobe malfunction. Just as I was getting ready to leave the house, a button fell off my blouse. Actually, I noticed a thread and pulled it and THEN the button fell off, but that’s beside the point. Let’s just say that if I had left it that way, it would have left nothing to the imagination about my northern parts.

That sent me into girl panic mode and I zoomed around the house like a squirrel in the middle of the road (before the car hits it) and I figured it would be quicker to sew the button back on than it would be to change tops. Sure.

Then I arrive at the gig to find out that it was booked as an outdoor gig for their patio opening. It was about 50-ish degrees and raining (at least we were setting up under an awning so we wouldn’t get soggy and/or electrocuted). And did I mention that the blouse material was very thin? It was. I realized too late that I should have taken the button “falling” off as a sign to have changed tops. But, I figured that I could just wear my jacket for the whole gig if I needed to. Mudcat was nice enough to offer me a sweatshirt that he had in the van if I wanted to change, but I toughed it out.

The rain let up and then stopped by the time we started playing and there were actually a few brave souls out there. And then the rain came back, but brought its good friend Wind Gust with it. So the brave souls turned out to be not so brave after all as they went running inside, while we kept playing.

The wind uprooted the table umbrellas and sent them hurling through the air like javelins. Thankfully the wind was blowing away from us. It was fun to see someone else turn into a squirrel in the middle of the road when the servers tried to catch those airborne umbrellas that were like giant Mary Poppins umbrellas, until they folded up and became weapons…

Not to be upstaged by the wind, the rain came back again. This time with a vengeance. That seemed like a good time to take a break. Mudcat became Carl Spakler when he told us that the heavy stuff wouldn’t be coming down for a while.

When our break was over it was still raining and had turned even colder, which meant there was nobody on the patio. The manager told us to move inside, so we did. Then it became an odd man out kinda gig.

The Miller Lite girls were there and I’m quite sure that their parents are so proud…and thankful that they chose that profession over being strippers. It was very amusing to me that grown men would gladly wear a plastic necklace with flashing lights as long as it was given to them by a stripper, I mean Miller Lite girl.

One of the TVs in the bar was showing a Seinfeld episode, which was fun to watch as we were singing and I could follow it since I pretty much knew all the lines. Perhaps I should be doing something else in my spare time…

5/10 - Mel's Crow's Nest

Well, it was definitely animal print day. On the way to the gig we saw a leopard print motorcycle (honest). Once we got to the gig, there was a woman sitting at the bar with a purse of patchwork animal print, another woman sitting in a booth had a zebra print purse, the hostess was wearing a leopard print top and oh yeah, and so was I. Geesh. And let's not forget my animal print rug.

As we were carrying the equipment in, I noticed a sign in the parking lot ~ "Harley parking only. All others will be crushed." That kinda cracked me up a bit.

After all the equipment was set up, Mudcat and I went outside and sat by the fire ring. However, there was no fire in it at the time. We didn't care. We sat there staring into it, which
made for interesting looks and/or comments from passersby.

The place was pretty hoppin' and everyone there was very nice to us.

The cutest little girl was on the deck just on the other side of the wall-o-window from where we were set up. She was running back and forth (made me tired watching, so I'm counting that as exercise) and with each step she took, her little shoes lit up. Why don't those shoes come in adult sizes? I really wanted a pair. When she finally got tired or bored, she stopped running and stood at the window watching us. Then she put her face against the glass and smooshed her nose all up. It sort of made me feel like we were an attraction at the zoo (please feed the animals), but anyway when we were done with our song she started jumping up and down, clapping. Now that's what I call a positive response!

And we had a brief moment of "Aqua Man meets the Polka King".

Other than that, I got nothin'.

5/9 - Solon Freeway Lounge

This place was way different than I expected, but in a good way. It was a bowling alley with a lounge/patio, but I didn't know about the lounge/patio part at first. I honestly thought that we were going to play in the bowling alley where you couldn't hear yourself think between the bowling sounds and the 8,540 kids (in my head count that's how many kids were there). Then I spotted the lounge area.

It was exactly similar to the Driftwood gig. Play inside...no, why don't you play outside...no, no
play inside...geesh. We played inside.

One area of the ceiling over the tables in the lounge was pretty cool. It was painted to look like the sky and it had miniature biplanes and triplanes and dirigibles (isn't dirigible a great word?) hanging from a track lighting kind of thing.

This place is quite popular for dads. They get to be good dads by taking their kids bowling and then the kids can bowl and the dads can sit in the lounge drinking barley sodas. Their kids ran in every now and then to get more money and then ran back out. Everybody was happy.

Well, not everybody...but, that's a whole different story.

5/2 – Slim & Chubby’s
This one was a whole band gig and thankfully, we had a big old stage to spread out on. As Anno put it, we had some real estate.

The stage also doubled as the dart throwing section of the bar. Thankfully, no one decided to throw any while we were playing.

We had to wait until the Cav’s were done playing before we started playing. I just love basketball. Or not.

There were a couple guys sitting at the bar who were really into what we were playing. Even when they went outside to the smoking area, we could still see them through the windows cheering us on.

And we had a couple of dancers, too.

Oh yeah, there was some chick who wanted to hear Journey. C-Man did his version of it and she was all kinds of happy. Then, during the next break the real song was playing. Talk about a happy girl. Geeze-o-petes. She was standing up on her chair cheering.

Then there was the odd sound check at the end of the gig…

4/26 - The Brew Keeper

Pretty cozy setting. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. Even had some requests.

Well, there was no drama tonight. However, a tale of two Mojos is in the offing.

The amusing thing to me was that there was some hip-hop guy booked right after us and his amps were about 3 times the size of ours. Kinda cracked me up. Guess he goes by the theory of quantity is better than quality. Now that's not nice, we didn't even stick around to hear him. I'm just being judgemental.

They had some yummy beer there. Not only can you brew your own beer, but they offer brewing your own wine, which might be kind of fun. No grape squishing between the toes, it's all pre-measured. We asked.

4/25 - The Factory

This place was an old factory (hence the name) that's been converted into a pretty neat bar/restaurant, but it's still stuck in the midst of other old factory type places. People know about it, though.

For some reason, the owner thought that we were a Mo-Town band, so he kept telling us to play more Mo-Town. We're not and we didn't.

Other than that, this gig was pretty uneventful too.

4/10 - LaPorte Inn

This was a pretty uneventful gig. Prozacly why it's taken me this long to enter the post.

The best thing was that the T.V. near the stage was tuned into the food network and one of the shows was about coffee. Yeah, I kinda lost track of my ownself. Mudcat was all ready to play "stop in the name of love" and did the usual count and I just stood there with the deer in the headlights look. Had to tear myself away from the tube. We started again.

You know how I hear snippets of conversations at gigs sometimes? Well, this one was a good one. Some guy was telling a girl there that her kneecaps were the sexiest things he had ever seen. So, I'm thinkin' that this chick either had really sexy kneecaps or that guy didn't get around much OR it's one of his lines. Probably that one.

The bartender was dancing behind the bar during a couple of the songs, so I guess he liked us.

Well, that's pretty much it for that gig.

4/5 - Norwalk Moose Lodge

Don't you think that a moose lodge should have moose tracks ice cream? Yeah, I do too.

We had a grand stage to play on. I think that Mudcat and C-Man might have been in different zip codes. Okay, fine then - it really wasn't that big. It was carpeted, but there was something questionable on the carpet right in front of me (it was like that when I got there) and of course I had to keep looking at it. It never went away nor did it get less questionable.

Very interesting people at this lodge-o-moose. Fast Freddy sang "house of the rising sun" and then Tim got on stage and "played" the air guitar while "singing". He and one of his buddies even had an air guitar contest during one of the songs.

One guy came up to the stage while I was singing "what's love got to do with it" and I honestly thought that he was coming up there to make me stop, which I almost did. I realized that wasn't the case when he started dancing. Alone. But that's okay, he was enjoying himself and I didn't have to stop singing. We had a couple of other dancers throughout the evening, but they let this guy fend for himself.

Another guy came up to us during one of the breaks and told me that my tambourine and maraca playing reminded him of The Monkeys, but I had to question if he actually meant the musical group or the zoological group. When he said like Davie Jones, I felt better.

It was a pretty good gig. We all meshed together really well (this place must have had good electricity).

We did play a wee game of hide-and-seek at one point, but that's okay. Everybody wins.

3/22 – Edison’s

Happy birthday, Anno!

We had a decent 1st and 2nd shift. A lot of people on 3rd shift were shirking their responsibilities. Maybe they were all in bed early so that they could get up for the Easter sunrise service. Sure.

Swoop (like what a bird does) sat in for Hollywood Dan, who sits in for Rev. Marty on the drums. He was loads of fun, but I’m sure he had mixed feelings about us.

Now, if Mudcat could only learn to bet for money, he’d be wealthy beyond compare. He won the pool. Well, not an actual swimming pool – that just doesn’t mix well with electricity, unless of course it’s the waterproof kind, but those outlets are really hard to find. Never mind.

We progressed from the Aqua Man set to the Marcel Marceau set. Nature can be a freaky thing.

I know, I know – enough with the inside jokes already.

There was a couple sitting right in front of me at the bar (and if you’ve ever been to Edison’s you know how close they were to me). They were engaged in what appeared to be a most romantic kiss. It’s been a really long time since I’ve engaged in any kissing, but I seem to remember that it’s not good practice to wipe your mouth with the back of your hand as soon as the kiss ends, while not turning away from the other kisser. Yeah, the chick did that. However, the guy either didn’t notice or didn’t care, since he kissed her again. The second kiss met with her approval. Either that or she waited until she was on the way to the bathroom to wipe her mouth.

Speaking of the bathroom, I have another bathroom story for you. This one is definitely much better than the last one. Here goes –

These 2 girls walk in together and as they’re standing next to each other, clearly the brighter of the pair said that the stall to the left was open. Dim girl asked, “your left or mine?” Bright girl said, “it’s the same left”. Seriously, I can’t make up stuff like that.

3/17 - The Great Lakes Brewing Co.

Happy St. Paddy's Day!

And it's Lola's 100th gig! Can you even believe it? Re-mark-able.

It was almost a marathon gig - 6 hours. The longest gig the boys have played is 7 hours, so I'm still catching up. But that's okay, 6 hours was more than enough. The cool thing is that we didn't repeat any songs.

We did one Irish song. Bobby McGee.

It was an interesting crowd. Started out young-ish and dunk-ish. Ended up being the after prom chaperones by the time we left. They still seemed to enjoy themselves and our music, so that was good.

Alex sat in with us for a couple of sets, even the Aqua Man set. It just can't be explained.

Peanuts made his appearance, breezed through (well as breezy as Peanuts gets) and was gone.

They fed and watered us, just like singing house plants. After we ate I was so full that I was a wee bit concerned that I might just drift off into a cat nap, but I managed to hold off on that until I hit the couch at home.

3/15 - Stop On Inn

Oh yeah, we had our very own personal, private Idaho friend for the evening (when he wasn't taking phone calls or going outside for a smoke break, but forgetting his cigarettes). Lawrence.
Apparently, in 5th grade Lawrence was chased home by some bullies and he turned that experience into a blues song, which of course he sang for us. Lawrence really wanted to be a movie director. That didn't seem to work out for him.

The chick's bathroom was a day-glow mess and had a questionable odor. Hey - it was like that when I got there. Honest. But, seriously it was scary. I don't know if they painted it like that
for the sobering up effect or the scared straight effect. It was the brightest pink and green that I've ever seen in my life. NOT pretty.

And then there was the boys' bathroom. We had a perfect view of the urinals every time the door was opened. I learned that most of the boys in this fine establishment are completely ready for the task at hand (pun intended) by the time they get to the urinal. They really need to tighten up the spring on that automatic door closer. The boys' bathroom was also painted white.

Aside from Lawrence and the bathrooms, it was a pretty uneventful gig. It seemed like everyone was laying low until Monday for a full blown St. Paddy's Day celebration. Every one was pretty low key. Okay, maybe not everyone. There was Lawrence after all.

2/29 – The Harland

I know, I know – that was a while ago. Hey, better late than never ya know?

Everyone was pretty subdued that night. Maybe it was the snow, maybe it was the magic beer mug. Not quite sure.

When C-Man sang Walkin’ the Dog, one of the guys at the bar did an “air yo-yo” (exactly similar to an air guitar). I was pretty amused by that.

People watching was pretty interesting, despite the subdued air. Had to be there.

We finally got to sing some new stuff (well, new for us) and that was most fun indeed.

Other than that, I got nothin’.

2/24 – AT Witz End

This place is a true biker bar, complete with bike tire skid marks on the floor (yes, inside).
We started out with just 2 people at the bar, but things picked up during the 3rd set. Everyone seemed to like us, so that was a plus.

Chase was our guest guitarist, and man-oh-jiminy-Christmas-balls can that kid play! He sat in for a few songs and he did a great job.

This place has an elevated stage and at first I didn’t like it, because it felt like we were too far removed from everyone. Then I realized that we were pretty much eye level with the big, big screen and the Godfather was playing, so I got to watch that for the 112th time. The smaller T.V.’s had NASCAR on them. I don’t get the appeal of that, unless there’s a crash. Of course I want a crash where no one gets hurt. It’s like watching figure skating and waiting for someone to fall.

But, the other reason that I was grateful for the elevated stage was when one of the “gentlemen” customers pulled up a chair and sat down directly in front of me and just stared up at me. It was a wee bit creepy, but don’t worry about me…I’ll be alright….

2/23 – Dine & Dance

If you’re like me, then you’ll think that by the name of the place it would have been a pretty nice joint. Oh, but we’re wrong.

It was the kind of place who’s regulars included a man named Pee Wee (it could very well be his real name) who talked like a bad version of Louis Armstrong and looked a little too much like a short relative of Grizzly Adams. Pee Wee also decided that Mudcat’s tie just had to go, which I think made Mud a tiny bit concerned that it was going to quickly move from a wardrobe item to a noose.

C-Man suggested that we should add a roll of chicken wire to our equipment for just such an occasion, but we made it through the evening without having anything thrown at us and Mud’s tie remained in tact.

And let’s not forget the weird and unidentifiable pounding with its very own synchronized blue flashing light coming from the place behind the bar. It sort of looked like a giant bug zapper, but it had a pounding sound, not a zapping sound. When I pulled in the parking lot, I thought for a brief moment that there was something horribly wrong with my little car. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case.

As we were leaving, Anno and I howled at the remains of the full moon, so that made everything all right (at least for me).

2/16 – Thunder Road

Well, this place had no issues…certainly not issues 4 or 5. I’d forgotten what it was like to not be able to breath. It was most unpleasant.

Once again, we had our resident “dancer”/ joke teller / tip giver.

Remember the guy from The Pump who looked all Harley gangster-like who was sipping wine? Well, I did it again with judging someone by their appearance. This guy was pretty big with the biker boots goin’on, his hair was halfway down his back and pulled into a pony tail with 3 rubber bands, which were sort of equally spaced. The entire back of his shirt sported a picture of a woman who was scantily clad (except for the thigh high boots and the whip). So, with that in mind I judged him as a person who would most certainly be into hard classic rock. Guess what song he requested – Moon Shadow, by Cat Stevens. Seriously. When Mudcat told him that we didn’t know that song, he proceeded to sing it for us. Then Mud realized that he had to be more specific and explained that he was familiar with the song, but didn’t play it. Ya just never know.

Then there was the guy sitting at the bar wearing a black T-shirt with really big yellow letters that spelled out “F#CK OFF”. So, I did. Pretty sure he’s not a people person.

The girls were the kind of girls who could pretty much take care of themselves too.

The stage at this place was pretty nice; hard wood floor, a railing around the edges, all colors of lights – even a disco light. Oh yeah, and one wall was all mirror. No, we didn’t strip.

However, there were little post card sized flyers on some of the tables with the date, Project Mojo and a bikini clad blond. Pretty sure that some of the boys were disappointed, since clearly none of us looks like that chick. Do you think it would be considered false advertising if that picture is on the website?

2/1- The Harland

Well, it was interesting to say the least.

I got a wee bit scared when we were setting up, because I thought that our stand in "drummer" was going to settle in behind us, but it turned out that he was just moving his drum set out so that we could have more room. Whew...

Lisa, Jeff, and Ron were there and they were very happy even before they arrived. They made for some very interesting people watching.

When Chloe arrived, Lisa introduced herself and her crew and invited Chloe to sit with them. I don't think I've seen her laugh quite so much in one sitting as she did with them.

Squirrel man was there, cashing in his postcard and hording one away for the next time.

My new friend, Bart showed up toward the end. As always, he offered to carry things for me and as always, I declined.

All in all, it was a pretty fun gig with minimal sleeping going on.

1/19 - Edison's Pub

When I walked in on time (yeah, Anno was just as shocked as you), there was 1 person at the bar. Not a good sign. And it was butt ass cold. Aren't I a master at pointing out the obvious?
But, I'm not talking about just outside. It was super duper cold in the bar too.

The very cool thing they had going for them were these candle holders made from Jager bottles. Mudcat's theory is that Jim and Eroc spent a lot of time there. Gotta know Jim and Eroc.
The bottles were cut so that they were just a rectangle, with about 3 inches of sand in the bottom and a votive candle holder (complete with candle) on top of the sand. A really great look. They also doubled as hand warmers during the breaks.

It was even more balmy every time someone opened the door. Since we were in direct line of the arctic blast every time the door opened, it was determined that there would more than likely be a wet T-shirt contest, which was followed by the frozen T-shirt contest comment, which was directly followed by "pornography for the blind". Now that's funny. I don't care what you say.

Josh was the 1 person who was at the bar when I got there and bless his heart, he was there for the duration. I'm well aware that his tenure had more to do with the beer than with us, but I don't' care. He was a nice boy who clapped for us EVERY time.

Barbara, the beer goddess took care of us with her special Lake Erie Highball (less the toothpick).

Oh, and we had a real life close talker. Thankfully, Bobby could also sing.

Things picked up a titch, but at one point in between songs a girl at the bar pointed out that there were more people in the band than were at the bar. See, I'm not the only one who's mastered the obvious.

At 1:00-ish, give or take an ish the place got packed. Must have been the food service industry drinking shift. By closing time, no one would leave. Last call was announced, drinks were taken away, lights were turned up high (which thankfully gave off a teensie bit of heat) and still no one left. They were either too drunk to notice or they didn't want to go back out into the colder cold than what was in the bar.

I swear it was like a scene from Northern Exposure with everyone sitting around in their parkas, hat, scarf, and gloves while hanging out socializing.

Oh, but let's not forget Psycho Boy. We were in the midst of packing up the equipment when this guy who looked like he couldn't even drive, much less be in a bar drinking, steps in front of me and asks me when the seance was going to start. I responded with, "seance?", to which he replied, "yeah, you know seance - calling the spirits". Once again, let me point out that I am not alone in the mastery of the obvious. So, of course I had to tell him that I was well aware of what the word meant. Then like a stoogebah, I asked him if he was in charge (of the seance, remember the seance?) and he told me that no one knows who's in charge and the people who are in charge don't know what's going on and that's the problem with our country. I told him that was good to know and then immersed myself in my work. Winding cords back up to the packing stage can be a very demanding job, which takes complete concentration.

After the van was packed and ready to roll Anno, Mud, and I howled at the moon (in 3 part harmony, no less). Hey, I know it wasn't official full-like, but it was close enough for government work.

Other than that, I got nothin'.

1/4 - The Pump

Again with the locked doors (see New Year's Eve post). Third time's a charm, though. Finally found my way inside.

Then I had a wee bit of technical difficulty - the rubber earpiece of my ear buds flew off into oblivion. It's way too stressful to have your rubber shoot across the room and yet still be expected to perform. Mud gave me a spare set of ear buds to use until we took a break and then went in search of my rubber. Anno was convinced that my magic carpet is truly magical, that it made my earpiece disappear. It didn't. With Mud's handy dandy flashlight, he found the earpiece resting comfortably on the floor behind Anno.

C-Man, Anno, and Mudcat were oh so too very excited to discover the guitar hooks on the walls just waiting to hold their guitars. It's all documented on film. Stupid me thought they were coat hooks. Oopsie.

Here's another misperception by Lola: when C-Man came back from the bar with his sandwich and the carryall for the condiments, I thought the carryall was a six pack of beer. I really need to stop thinking. Luckily, I've chosen something that shouldn't be too difficult to accomplish!

We had some dancers, but they must have tuckered themselves out, because they went back to their table to chair dance. Oh well, at least they were enjoying themselves.

Never judge a book by it's cover (although I have read a lot of good books choosing them solely by their cover), or a man by his clothes. There was a big ole burly guy sitting at the bar sporting a well worn leather jacket and a derby hat. Now don't you picture him drinking whisky? Well, I did. Nope - white zinfandel. Go figure.

Oh, and let's not forget the "terrorist cell" shooting pool all night. Their under roos of choice was tightie whities. At least we were safe in the knowledge that their own personal cue balls were not free to roam about the cabin.

It's also been determined that Mudcat does not like SPAM and that Yahoo driving directions suck (and not in a good way).

1/3 – Put-In-Bay, Lakewood

The evening was one of distorted unrest, but some of us rested during the distortion.

And I don’t know about you, but if bartending were my profession and someone ordered water, I would find the biggest glass that I could to put that water in. Since the water is free, there’s a darn good chance that the person ordering the water will not leave a tip, so the big glass would mean less trips back to the bar, which would mean less work for the bartender to do for free. So then why would a bartender find the tiniest cup (next to a shot glass) to serve water in? Perhaps he just loves his job so much that he doesn’t do it for the money. Or not. Guess what size glass I got when I ordered water.

Here’s a cold weather tip: frigid temperatures will not affect you if you are either from Minnesota, drunk, or both.

If you’re in need of a mathematical tip, then you’ve come to the right place. Ready? Let’s begin. No wait, that’s learning a foreign language. Okay, whatever.
When spoken, the words “one” and “eleven” sound quite different and are generally not interchangeable. When written, 11 becomes 1 if the person writing those numbers gets tired (or forgets to keep writing). When ending a gig, just split the difference and stop at midnight.

Now get out there in the cold and do some math.

12/31 - The Elyria Eagle's Club

Girls, I’m sure you already know this and even you boys will think it’s most obvious, but I figured it out from trial by fire – high healed dress sandals are not meant for hiking, they’re just meant to be used as an accessory for your feet while sitting.

And here’s how I learned that: When I got to the gig I parked next to the band van near the side door, figuring that would be the most logical place to park. It was for leaving the building, but not for entering. There was no door handle on the outside of that particular door. As I was making my way around the front of the building to the main door, which turned out to be at the opposite end of the building, not in the middle or even remotely close to the middle of the building, I happened upon yet another door with no handle.

I was not quite to the completely annoyed stages of my travels yet and my dogs were just starting to whine a wee bit when I finally arrived at the front door complete with handles! However, it was also locked. There was a nice hand written sign on the door informing me that the place was closed for a private party. Well yeah, that’s why I was there. It also instructed me to go to the back door.

I stood there for a moment weighing my options as to which would be the shortest route, assuming that the back door would be directly opposite the front door. So I made my way around the building to where the sidewalk ended (which was not nearly as much fun as Shel Silverstein’s version) only to come upon a fenced in area that was not meant for maneuvering around. I did have a flicker of hope when I saw another door on the side of the building just before the sidewalk ended, but oh guess what - no door handle. Yeah, I was just as shocked as you.

Then I realized that I would have to walk back up the side of the building, all the way across the front of the building, down the other side of the building, all the way across the back of the building to get to where I hoped would be a back door that was unlocked, complete with a handle.

My dogs progressed from a whine to a full-fledged bark about half way back across the front and I was quickly approaching the completely annoyed stage of my travels.

I finally made it to the back door and it did have a handle and it was unlocked. This door opened right into the main room where about 70 people had synchronized head turning to see who was entering. I was a little uncomfortable having all those eyes staring at me, but they quickly lost interest and looked away.

Apparently the way to celebrate New Year’s Eve in Elyria is by wearing your best football jersey and feasting on kielbasa and sauerkraut, canned green beans, corn and potatoes. Oops, almost forgot the roll and butter.

The best way to wash down that gourmet feast is with Elyria’s own special water, which needed a lot of lemon to make it drinkable. Other than the weird feeling it left my tongue with and Mud getting some of the water stuck in his teeth it was a most refreshing beverage.

Later that same day, some of the people were calling out “rock and roll!”, so we played Mony Mony and when it gets to the part you all know and love, C-Man and Anno yelled it out. Everyone just stared up at us like we had burst into flames and gone straight to Hell. Ya see, there was a really big sign at the side of the bar warning us that profanity would not be tolerated. Great. So, when it came around again on the guitar they changed it up to the PG version of “stay home, read a book”. We returned from the depths of Hell to our original forms. I was hoping for a new form for myself, but all I got was the same old one. Oh well, at least I wasn’t on fire anymore.

We did have some dancers, but it took them until about 11:00 to finally get out on the dance floor.

Bob & Rita celebrated their 31st wedding anniversary (twice).

Tom came up and sang Johnny Be Good.

Other than that, I got nothin’.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!